Blogging

Ok, bloggings boring and too much work. Havent done it in awhile and don't plan to. Blog won't get closed but I won't be blogging unless I get really bored. So goodbye people (never thought I'd last this long)

A lesson

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, Ryan, 3. The boysbegan to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw theopportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say,'Let my brother have the first pancake. I can wait.'" Kevin turned to hisyounger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"

What is God?

Once there was a little boy. He was curious about God so he went and asked his mother. "Mommy, is God a man or a woman?"
His mother replied, "God is both a man and a woman."
"Mommy, is God black or white?"
His mother replied, "God is both black andwhite.
"Mommy, is God gay or straight?"
His mother was somewhat shocked at his question, but she answered anyway, "God is both gay and straight."
Thelittle boy nodded with understanding. "Mommy, is God Michael Jackson?"

My 100th Post

Jesus saw a crowd chasing down a woman to stone her andapproached them.
"What's going on here, anyway?" he asked.
"This woman was found committing adultery and the law says weshould stone her!" one of the crowd responded.
"Wait," yelled Jesus, "Let he who is without sin cast the firststone."
Suddenly, a stone was thrown from out of the sky, and knocked the woman on the side of her head.
"Aw, c'mon, Dad...," Jesus cried, "I'm trying to make a pointhere!"

Yay God (the sequel)

I received an email today asking what was Yay God and I guess I should have gone over that. Yay God is a youth group for kids from grade 5ish-7ish (pretty much people shorter then me) and will be up again during the school year. We meet at Hatzic Secondary and play few shorts such as floor hockey, soccer, touch football, basketball, volleyball, dodgeball and basically any sport with the word ball in it. After that we have sacks (a.k.a sugar) and have a talk. Don't ask me why we give them sweets before the quiet talk... not my department. So along with the website that I, Ben the magnificent, has created there will also be a mailing list. Anyone who's interested in the mailing list or wants so more information can contact at b_williams_3@hotmail.com.

Yay God

Inform the little ones! Yay God will soon be undergoing major changes. First of all theres a website.

letter from camp

Dear Mom and Dad,
Our Scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and are worried. We are Okay. Only one of our tents and two sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up on the mountain looking for Adam when it happened. Oh yes, please call Adam's mother and tell her he is okay. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found Adam in the dark if it hadn't been for the lightning. Scoutmaster Keith got mad at Adam for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Adam said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him.

Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas will blow up? The wet wood didn't burn, but one of the tents did and also some of our clothes. Matthew is going to look weird until his hair grows back.

We will be home Saturday if Scoutmaster Keith gets the bus fixed. It wasn't his fault about the wreck. The brakes worked okay when we left. Scoutmaster Keith said that with a bus that old you have to expect something to break. He doesn't care if we get dirty, and if it's hot, sometimes he lets us ride on the fenders. It gets pretty hot with 45 people in a bus. He let us take turns riding in the trailer until the highway patrol man stopped and talked to us.

Scoutmaster keith is a neat guy. Don't worry, he is a good driver. In fact, he is teaching Jessie how to drive on the mountain roads where there isn't any traffic. All we ever see up there are logging trucks.

This morning all of the guys were diving off the rocks and swimming out in the lake. Scoutmaster Keith wouldn't let me because I can't swim and Adam was afraid he would sink because of his cast, so he let us take the canoe across the lake. It was great. You can still see some of the trees under the water from the flood.

Scoutmaster Keith isn't crabby like some scoutmasters. He didn't even get mad about the life jackets. He has to spend a lot of time working on the bus so we are trying not to cause him any trouble.

Guess what? We have all passed our first aid merit badges. When Andrew dived into the lake and cut his arm, we got to see how a tourniquet works. Steven and I threw up, but Scoutmaster Keith said it probably was just food poisoning from the leftover chicken. He said they got sick that way with food they ate in prison.

I'm so glad he got out and became our scoutmaster. He said he sure figured out how to gets things done better while he was doing his time. By the way, what is a pedal-file?

I have to go now. We are going to town to mail our letters and buy some more beer. Don't worry about anything. We are fine.

Love, Chris

111 seconds

http://www.addictinggames.com/labyrinth.html

Facts

-In West Virginia, only babies can ride in a baby carriage.
-You use more calories eating celery than there are in the celery itself.
-In Michigan, it is illegal to chain an alligator to a fire hydrant.
-It is estimated that millions of trees in the world are accidentally planted by squirrels who bury nuts and then forget where they hid them.
-The worlds oldest piece of chewing gum is over 9000 years old.
-13 people each year are killed by Vending Machine's falling on them.
-More than 2500 left handed people are killed every year from using right handed products.
-It is estimated that at any one time, 0.7% of the world's population are drunk.
-At - 40 degrees Centigrade a person loses about 14.4 calories per hour by breathing.
-You burn more calories sleeping than you do watching T.V.
-The yo-yo was originally a weapon used in the Philippine jungles.
-If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
-Kermit the Frog has 11 points on his collar around his neck.
-Coca-cola was originally green.
-Ketchup was sold in the 1830s as medicine.
-Human thigh bones are stronger than concrete.
-Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a spacesuit damages them.
-On average, 100 people choke to death on ball-point pens every year.
-The longest word in the English language, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. The only other word with the same amount of letters is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconioses, its plural.
-To escape the grip of a crocodile's jaws, push your thumbs into its eyeballs -- it will let you go instantly.

100 Years Ago

-The average life expectancy in the United States was forty-seven.
-Only 14 percent of the homes in the United States had a bathtub.
-Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone. A three minute call from Denver to New York City cost eleven dollars.
-There were only 8,000 cars in the US and only 144 miles of paved roads.
-The maximum speed limit in most cities was ten mph. Alabama, Mississippi, Iowa, and Tennessee were each more heavily populated than California.
-With a mere 1.4 million residents, California was only the twenty-first most populous state in the Union.
-The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower.
-The average wage in the U.S. was twenty-two cents an hour.
-The average U.S. worker made between $200 and $400 per year.
-A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year, a dentist $2500 per year, a veterinarian between $1500 and $4000 per year, and a mechanical engineer about $5000 per year.
-More than 95 percent of all births in the United States took place at home.
-Ninety percent of all U.S. physicians had no college education.
-Instead, they attended medical schools, many of which were condemned in the press and by the government as "substandard." Sugar cost four cents a pound.
-Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen. Coffee cost fifteen cents a pound.
-Most women only washed their hair once a month and used borax or egg yolks for shampoo. Canada passed a law prohibiting poor people from entering the country for any reason, either as travelers or immigrants.
-The five leading causes of death in the U.S. were: 1. Pneumonia and influenza 2. Tuberculosis 3. Diarrhea 4. Heart disease 5. Stroke.
-The American flag had 45 stars. Arizona, Oklahoma, New Mexico, Hawaii and Alaska hadn't been admitted to the Union yet.
-Drive-by-shootings, in which teenage boys galloped down the street on horses and started randomly shooting at houses, carriages, or anything else that caught their fancy, were an ongoing problem in Denver and other cities in the West.
-The population of Las Vegas, Nevada was thirty. The remote desert community was inhabited by only a handful of ranchers and their families.
-Plutonium, insulin, and antibiotics hadn't been discovered yet.
-Scotch tape, crossword puzzles, canned beer, and iced tea hadn't been invented.
-There was no Mother's Day or Father's Day.
-One in ten U.S. adults couldn't read or write.
-Only 6 percent of all Americans had graduated from high school.
-Some medical authorities warned that professional seamstresses were apt to become sexually aroused by the steady rhythm, hour after hour, of the sewing machine's foot pedals. They recommended slipping bromide, which was thought to diminish sexual desire,into the woman's drinking water.
-Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all available over the counter at corner drugstores. According to one pharmacist, "Heroin clears the complexion, gives buoyancy to the mind, regulates the stomach and the bowels, and is, in fact, a perfect guardian of health.
-Coca-Cola contained cocaine instead of caffeine.
-Punch card data processing had recently been developed, and early predecessors of the modern computer were used for the first time by the government to help compile the 1900 census.
-Eighteen percent of households in the United States had at least one full-time servant or domestic.

Ken... post?

Good golly, Kenneth FINALLY BLOGGED SOMETHING! and its actually is pretty good.

Argument

The university professor challenged his students with this question.

"Did God create everything that exists?"

A student bravely replied, "Yes, he did!"

"God created everything?" The professor asked.

"Yes sir", the student replied.

The professor answered, "If God created everything, then God created evil, since evil exists, and according to the principal that our works define who we are, then God is evil".

The student became quiet before such an answer. The professor, quite pleased with himself, boasted to the students that he had proven once more that the Christian faith was a myth.

Another student raised his hand and said, "Can I ask you a question professor?"

"Of course", replied the professor.

The student stood up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?"

"What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never been cold?" The students snickered at the young man's question.

The young man replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist! According to the laws of physics, what we consider cold is in reality the absence of heat. Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-460° F) is the total absence of heat; all matter becomes inert and incapable of reaction at that temperature. Cold does not exist. We have created this word to describe how we feel if we have no heat."

The student continued, "Professor, does darkness exist?"

The professor responded, "Of course it does."

The student replied, "Once again you are wrong sir, darkness does not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light. Light we can study, but not darkness. In fact we can use Newton's prism to break white light into many colors and study the various wavelengths of each color.

You cannot measure darkness. A simple ray of light can break into a world of darkness and illuminate it. How can you know how dark a certain space is? You measure the amount of light present. Isn't this correct? Darkness is a term used by man to describe what happens when there is no light present."

Finally the young man asked the professor, "Sir, does evil exist?"

Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course as I have already said. We see it every day.

It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil."

To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is not like faith, or love that exist just as does light and heat. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light."

The professor sat down.

The young man's name --- Albert Einstein

Gossip Hurts

"The How" is Back in Town

My grandpa Howie is in town (sweeeeeeet) and I couldn't be happier. Yesterday, being the stud that I most certainly am, had a girl over and what are the odds grandpa would start flirting with her... oh grandpa! Your such a heart-thob, but sorry ladies he's taken.

Done Some Serious thinking

I had a friend over recently and we were talking about missionary work and it got me thinking. Theres this guy, you may have heard of, named Tony Campolo who said "I don't know how your theology works, but if Jesus has a choice between stained glass windows and feeding starving kids in Haiti , I have a feeling he'd choose the starving kids in Haiti." When I read this I thought to myself "How self centered am I!" I honestly can't believe how little I've done with my life. Tony also says "Don't be satisfied with just pumping blood." And I'm not. I'm sick and tired of all this meaningless crap I have that I could use to do so much more. If I won the lottery, would I spend it on myself, or do something drastic that could change the lifes of so many people. When I look at people like Bono or our boy Tony I just find it upsetting that I can't... that I don't do something a little bit more.

My favorite quote

Going into a Church doesn't make you a christian anymore then going into a garage makes you a car.

Damage

There was a boy who had such a temper. His father went to the boy and said "Everytime you loose your temper I want you to take a nail and hammer it into that fence." The boy agreed to do it and went away. The first day this boy nailed 36 nails, then a little less, and then a little less. Eventually the boy went to his father and said "Daddy! I didn't nail at all today." then father watched and after a few days the boy still hadn't used any nails. His father went to him and told him to remove a nail each day he didn't loose his temper. After all the nails were removed the dad said "Look at the holes in the fence. Everytime you do something wrong and ask for forgiveness the damage is still there."